How to be a good mother ... or not

WHAT makes a woman a good mother? Is a woman a super mum when despite having a young baby always manages to have clean washing and a spotless kitchen and bathroom and still puts on a MasterChef type dinner for her family (today I couldn't even manage to defrost the steaks before B came home, bugger). 


Perhaps she is a woman who takes her young baby to baby-gym classes once a week (something I didn't even know about until I heard another mother talking about it today), as well as other super-dooper baby development accelerator activities: baby sign language anyone? No really, wow. I wish I could be that woman. 


Or even the woman with a baby who is on time at least some of the time. Nope, that's not me either. I haven't even worked out how to breastfeed in public without feeling like I have my clothes on inside-out (thinking people are gawking at my inability or just noticing my discomfort at revealing my breasts in a public place. I've braved or should I write 'bared' it before and have found that people do look at you as though you're some kind of quasi-exhibitionist rather than someone who is trying to feed her hungry baby). 


But even with my clothes on inside-out I would feel like I knew what I was doing more (that is, making a quick dash to the car to get home to change pronto). Also, is it just me or have you ever wondered whether nursing bras were made by men as for some reason I still can't get those clips undone with one hand, damn it.   


But stubborn bra clips, shy bare breasts and baby gym aside, I love my baby girl. I have loved her since I first found out she was growing in my uterus when B was waiting anxiously on the other side of the bathroom door... is she, isn't she? Two pretty pink lines and the rest, well you know, it's a beautiful story, the journey of life.


I'll never be a super mum because between you and me my house was never spotless even before having a baby, but if my baby girl ever asks me one day why I didn't do all those things I should be doing, being a super mum and all that, I will tell her it's only because I was too busy loving her.